Bigger

“'Cause we were born for better days
We’ll find a way, yeah
We’re gonna be bigger
Don't give up, you’re more than enough
Believe me love, yeah
You’re gonna be bigger”


-Sugarland’s song “Bigger”


I have been listening to this song/album on repeat recently partly because I just love Sugarland and partly because this song is speaking to my heart right now.


Our life is crazy, it always is.  We always joke that we never do anything small.  The first time we bought a house we were on vacation and I accepted my first “adult” job on that exact same vacation.  Now three years after building our second house together we are looking at moving again…more on that later.


Last week was my first full week back at work from maternity leave.  I was driving the school bus to pick up students from a field trip and had my mom on speaker phone.  We were discussing preparations for my sister’s graduation party that was coming up that weekend.  Before we got off the phone we reviewed things to make sure all was set and then laughed about the previous weekend when my fam of five had traveled to IL without any extra clothes for our infant (I blame my mom brain) and traveled back to IN forgetting my jewelry in IL. I told my mom that with three kids and two dogs it is a wonder if we make it anywhere without forgetting something.  She then responded with how proud she was of us and how well we handle everything. It was like she knew that I would need this statement for the rest of this day.


About ten minutes after that phone call I was at a kids play place waiting for fifteen students to get shoes on when I looked at my phone and saw I had two missed calls from my husband.  I called him back and he asked if I wanted to meet for lunch.  I thought it was odd and out of the ordinary but then remembered our lunch dates while I was on maternity leave and how we said we would make it a point to have day dates even when I went back to work.  Before I could respond he said “I have some bad news.”  I immediately asked if it was about the house…


At this point in the story we have closed on our 2+ acre lot and are continuing to wait for all of our prints/plans for the new house to be completely finalized before signing off on the loan.


…he responded with “no, it is about my job.  I got fired.”  My mind was racing, I felt like I had been punched in the stomach, and I looked straight in front of me to see my five year old standing in line with her class ready to get on the bus.  I couldn’t react. I couldn’t show emotion. I couldn’t even ask the millions of questions that were flooding into my mind. 


We had lunch and a heart to heart together that day. 


We will make it through all of this of that I am certain.  God has a plan and little things reassure me of  this all the time.


I am so incredibly thankful for my husband who is such a strong leader of our family.  I am thankful for our kids who make us smile through all of this and who keep our minds off of it with all their illnesses this week Smile.  I am thankful for our loving families and friends who have been so supportive through this time.  I am thankful that Nathan has the skills needed to find another decent job quickly.  I am thankful for these trials that show us God’s love and his plan for all of us. 


“We’re gonna be bigger”

~Kristin
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© 2012 Kristin Roe